Abuse team - амер. вариант
Коротко: девушка с паранойей (в данном контексте это не фигура речи) уничтожает пользователя lj с помощью abuse team. Уничтоженный пользователь печатает переписку с абьюзом в другом блоге

Переписка выглядит совершенно прекрасно:
Abuse team: "когда вы пишете "безумная сука", вы имеете в виду юзера Мелани"
Suspended user: "нет, я не имею ее в виду, и, сказать правду, я имею в виду женщину по имени Ким".
Справедливости ради надо заметить, что уничтоженный юзер имеет удивительные для русского жж претензии к женщине по имени Ким, а именно, что она ежедневно посещает его журнал. Но он хотя бы не жалуется на это в абьюз.

Correspondence with abuse is really funny - like banging into one brick wall of stupidity:

"First of all, I hold the account yellow_finch, but cdaae is not mine. You can check IPs to see that my account is in Illinois in the US, and cdaae's, who is a friend of mine, is in the UK. Second of all, I'd like to know how I broke the notice of no contact, as I have not mentioned Melanie Somers in any of my posts or comments, or anything related to her. Thank you."

"Number one, I would like to know what kind of evidence you have to believe that I was referring to Melanie Somers. Number two, you are, once again, incorrect in your assumptions. Melanie Somers is a known pathological liar. She has egocentrism issues and is extremely paranoid. It comes to no surprise to me that she believed I was talking about her. The post was in fact directed to a woman named Kim...
You have suspended three of my accounts (yellow_finch, miss_finch, alleykitten_), cdaae's account, and alleykitten's account all based on one paranoid girl's delusions and on three incorrect assumptions. I find it extremely unprofessional of your service to suspend paid user accounts based on (incorrect) assumptions and not based on solid facts. I recognize and thank that you have apologized for your assumptions to alleykitten, but you still need to apologize to both cdaae and myself for your incorrect assumptions, and you need to rectify this situation and reinstate all of the affected accounts. Please be professional enough to admit you have made a mistake."

Abuse team:
"Please allow us to explain what has happened. A Notice of No Contact was issued on 05/02/2005 to you through your cdaae13 account concerning LiveJournal user vanimaestel and all of her related accounts. This notice stated "you may not write about her in your journal or any related account sections thereof, or in any community journal, in any way, shape, or form." This notice applied to all accounts created and under your control and meant you may not post about them in any way whatsoever, regardless of inference. On 05/22/2005, you violated this notice and your cdaae13 account was suspended. Per the Notice of No Contact, all of your current accounts should have been suspended. Only your cdaae13 account was and you were allowed to continue to use our Service. The Notice of No Contact and its provisions however, were still in effect.

You violated the provisions of the Notice of No Contact with the following entries:

http://yellow-finch.livejournal.com/52466.html
http://yellow-finch.livejournal.com/52808.html

In these entries, you referenced LiveJournal user vanimaestel. While this reference was not by name, inference was recognized to be about them which violated the provision of "any way, shape or form". Because of this, your yellow_finch account and all other accounts registered to you have been suspended."

"Dear LiveJournal user yellow_finch,

Thank you for your reply. In both of these entries you make reference to your "batshit insanse stalker" which starts a thread about "Melee" who is LiveJournal user vanimaestel. As we have stated, you were to make no mention of this user in any way, shape or form. While you may not have directly participated in the resulting threads, inference was there and obvious as to whom you were speaking of in your initial entries.

Please allow us to clarify. The Notice of No Contact is explicit in that it allows no mention of the individual in any way, shape or form. This includes inference to an individual and links about them that could point to content outside of LiveJournal. The intention of a Notice of No Contact is to quell harassment and feuding between individuals on LiveJournal's servers. It is a final resort used before suspension action is taken. When it is issued, neither party should engage in any discussion whatsoever in any form about each other. If one of the individual's involved wishes to say something about the other by referencing nicknames, derogatory name calling, etc, it should be done outside of LiveJournal's service and not linked in any way to it.

To make this absolutely clear, you should not link, discuss, vent or post anything that could have any relation whatsoever to the individual(s) covered by the Notice of No Contact."

"As I told you before, the "batshit insane stalker" I was referring to is a woman named Kim."

Etc. etc.


Source: http://community.livejournal.com/abuse_lj_abuse/72673.html