South Park: BLU (Russian Elections '07 Edn.)
What would Mr. Putin do?

What would Mr. Putin do
If he was here right now?
He'd make a Plan
And he'd follow through!
That's what Mr. Putin'd do!

When Mr. Putin was in the Olympics,
Skating for the gold,
He did two sow cows and a triple lutz,
While wearing a blindfold.

When Mr. Putin was in the Alps,
Fighting grizzly bears,
He used his magical fire breath,
And saved the maidens fair.

So what would Mr. Putin do
If he were here today,
I'm sure he'd kick an arse or two,
That's what Mr. Putin'd do.

And what would Mr. Putin do,
He'd call all the kids in town,
And tell them to unite for true
That's what Mr. Putin'd do.

When Mr. Putin travelled through time
To the year three thousand ten,
He fought the Evil Robot King
And saved the human race again

And when Mr. Putin built the pyramids,
He beat up Dschinghis Khan.
Coz Mr. Putin doesn't take shit from a-ny-bo-dy...

(No, Sasha! That tea is really ''hot''! Don't drink that!

I've never seen a man eat so much Polonium.
I've never seen a man eat so much Polonium.
I've never seen a man eat so much Polonium.
I've never seen a man eat so much Polonium.
I've never seen a man eat so much Polonium.
I've never seen a man eat so much Polonium.
I've never seen a man eat so much Polonium.)

Mr. Putin was born
On the planet of Krynuck,
He came to Earth to save us all
From oligarchs that suck!

Aydi-oh! Aydi-ay! Mr. Putin's here!
So round up all your lasses, and tell them to have no fear!

I said, "Come over here my honey,
And I'm going to take off my pants,
And I'm going to make dirty love to you!"
Cuz that's what Mr. Putin'd do!

Cuz that's what Mr. Putin'd do!

---

It's Easy M'Kay

[Mr. Putin:]
There are times when you get suckered in
By drugs and alchohol and sex with women, m'kay
But it's when you do these things too much
That you've become an addict and must get back in touch

You can do it, it's all up to you, m'kay
With my little Plan you can change your life tooo-day
You don't have to spend your life addicted to smack
Homeless on the streets giving handjobs for crack
Follow my Plan and very soon you will saa-aayy, its easy, m'kay

[Russian citizens:]
We can do it it's all up to us, mmm'kay (m'kay!)
With Mr. Putin's plan we can change our lives tooo-day
([Mr. Putin:]
You can change it today)
[Russian citizens:]
We don't have to spend our lives shootin' up in the trash
Homeless on the streets giving handjobs for cash
Follow His Plan and very soon you will saa-aayy
It's easy m'kay!

---

Bitch

[Mr. Putin:]
Weeelllll,

Misha's a bitch, and Vitya's a bitch,
They're the biggest bitches in the whole wide world,
And Yulya's a bitch, if there ever was a bitch,
She's a bitch to all the boys and girls.

On Monday she's a bitch
On Tuesday she's a bitch
On Wednesday through Saturday she's a bitch
Then on Sunday just to be different,
She's a super king Kamehameha byatch

Have you ever met my ex-friend Boris,
He's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world,
He's a mean Jewish bitch, he has stupid hair,
He's a bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch
Bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch
He's a stupid bitch, Beryoza's a bitch,
And he's such a dirty bitch.

I really mean it,
Boris B. - he's a big fat, stinking bitch
Big old fat fuckin' bitch, Boriiiiis
Yeahhhhh
Chaaaaa

---

I'm super

[Big R.A.:]
Bombs are flying
People are dying
Children are crying
Politicians are lying too

Cancer is killing
Gazprom's spilling
The whole world's gone to hell
But how are you?

I’m super
Thanks for asking
All things considered I couldn't be better
I must say
I’m feeling super
No, nothing bugs me
Everything is super when you're...
...don’t you think I look cute in this yacht

I’m so sorry
Mr. Cripple
But I just can’t feel too bad for you right now
Because I’m feeling so insanely super
that even the fact that you can’t walk can’t bring me down

[Russian citizens:]
He’s super, thanks for asking
All things considered he couldn't be better
He must say

[Big R.A.:]
I’m super
No nothing bugs me
Everything is super when you're...
...don’t you think I look cute with this yacht
This little plane
And this west London football club
I’m super

[Russian citizens:]
In the barracks and the trenches as well
Big R.A. says do buy, do sell
Yes he's super and he's proud to be rich!
Everything is super when you’re Abramovich.
When you're R.A.!

---

The Election Day

[Mr. Putin:]
God will smile upon you that day
The fate of a nation in your hands
And blessed be the citizens
Who vote with all their bravery
'Til only the righteous stand

You won't see online flames
That bellow in the night
You'll vote in all our names
For what I know is right
And when you all get shot
And cannot carry on
Though you die, Mr. Putin lives on

[Russian citizens:]
You may get stabbed in the head
With a dagger or a sword
You may be burned to death
Or skinned alive, or worse
But when they torture you
You will not feel the need to run, for,
Though you die, Mr. Putin lives on

[Mr. Ivanov:]
Blame Georgia!
Blame Georgia!
Because the country's gone awry
Tomorrow night, these freaks will fry!

[Russian citizens:]
Tomorrow night
Our lives will change
Tomorrow night
We'll be entertained
Oh, an election
What a sight!
Tomorrow night!

[Berezovsky:]
In Russia there is so much room
Where babies burp and flowers bloom
Tomorrow night the country's doomed
And so I will be going soon!

[Belyh & Zyuganov]
Shut your fucking face, uncle Vova!
You're a boner-biting bastard, uncle Vova...

[Belyh:]
Looks like we may be out of luck!

[Zyuganov:]
Tomorrow night, we're pretty fucked!

[Russian children:]
What did our parents start this for?
Who-the-fuck are they voting for?
When did this song become a marathon?

[Berezovsky:]
I want to be
There!

[Mr. Ivanov:]
When Yushchenko is dead and gone
There'll be no more Serdyuchka-clown!

[Mr. Putin:]
They may cut your dick in half
And serve it to a pig
And though it hurts, you'll laugh
And dance a dickless jig
But that's the way it goes
In elections you're shat upon
Though you die, Mr. Putin lives on!

[Russian citizens:]
Blame Georgia!
Blame Yushchenko!
Blame USA!