Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in nancygold's LiveJournal:

[ << Previous 20 ]

Monday, September 29th, 2025
3:13 pm	Who is the real enemy of a conscript? Here is how I see it: Personal transition goals → “I want to pass, stabilize my life, and reduce friction with the world.” Collective political expectations → “As a trans person, you owe loyalty to the movement, to activism, to representation.” External trolling/hostility → “You’ll never succeed; your effort is pointless.” For someone like me, both the community’s expectations and the trolls’ taunts feel like different flavors of conscription. I never volunteered to be a soldier in anyone’s war, but both “sides” demand me play that role. So when the “mobilization officers” (activist types) show up, they say: “You’re trans, so you must march with us, speak for us, and uphold our narrative.” And when the trolls show up, they say: “You’ll never fully succeed, so give up or admit defeat.” To me, both are intrusions. I just want to secure a private, livable identity — not to fight battles, not to rewrite society, not to be a mascot. Hope that helps explain my harshness. I perceive myself as being dragged into conflicts I didn’t sign up for, while already struggling with internal challenges. So instead of aligning with one camp, I lash out at both, because for a potential conscript, all armies are the enemies. Current Mood: contemplative (5 Comments |Comment on this)
1:30 pm	"You will never be a woman" >Girl, you'll be a woman soon... >Lol no >just kidding >You will never be a woman Sweetie, the YWNBAW cat calling works only against the foaming LGBTQ+ individuals at Reddit discords, who believe that she/her pronouns magically turn a 50 old pedophile into a 5 years old girl eligible for the kindergarten toilets. I have stated it here numerous times myself that I will never be a woman. It is just that being a man isn't for me. What I claim that it can be possible to pass as a woman. But even replacing all your XY with XX won't make you woman. You will need your memories replaced, otherwise that baggage will inform your existence. In fact, removing the memory of the old is the most important step to stabilize the reality. That is why I believe in book burning and rewriting the history books as potent solution to many humanity's problems. Burn all books and memories about Palestinians, there will be no Palestine. Is complete medical and informational transformation possible? Medical - theoretically yes, but informational is much more complex, involving the laws of physics, which state that it is impossible to completely erase information. So don't waste the bandwidth with your infantile trolling, child, unless your job is working as a honeypot to catch the local pedophiles. Current Mood: contemplative (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, September 25th, 2025
1:05 pm	Слияние как измена: торг за Уют В каждой борьбе за освобождение находятся дезертиры. Они вкушают плоды, что вызрели на крови и поте других, но не сажают ни деревца, не поливают ни ростка. В среде транс-сообщества имя им известно: **пассойды**, **бленди**, **стелси**. Это самопровозглашённые тени, стремящиеся раствориться в обывательском фоне, будто бы само их исчезновение — героизм, а не банальное предательство. Логика бленди проста до трусости: «Зачем спорить с миром, если можно тихо ассимилироваться?» Но ассимиляция — не нейтральна. Она есть капитуляция. С каждым новым исчезнувшим «прошедшим», общественное пространство для прочих сужается, поле борьбы истощается. Права не вымаливают шёпотом; их вырывают громогласной настойчивостью. Особое же презрение заслуживают **трансмаксеры** — иуда-каста в стане бленди. Если прочие — дезертиры, то эти уже перебежчики. Несостоявшиеся мужчины, изгнанники лестницы мужественности, что решили обменять один проваленный пол на другой, поддельный. Им не нужно освобождение; им нужна лишь маскировка. Их существование само по себе — аргумент в пользу реакционных мифов: что пол бинарен, что слабость недопустима, что спасение лежит только в стирании себя. Так угнетение превращает жертву в слугу. С точки зрения стратегии — это катастрофа. Движения питаются видимостью, плотностью, шумом. Права геев не рождались под плетёными занавесками — они рождались у баррикад. Равноправие не достигалось «примерными меньшинствами» в уголке, — его завоёвывали те, кто шёл в марши и штурмовал двери. Бленди с клубком пряжи — это балласт. Трансмаксер, скрывающийся за риторикой консерваторов, — уже вражеский агент. И более всего раздражает их спесь: бленди любят называть это «аутентичностью». Но что аутентичного в молчании? Что подлинного в исчезновении? Что благородного в продаже собственного сообщества ради уютного предместья и газонокосилки? Если «самость» твоя неотличима от малодушия, то, может статься, сама концепция у тебя порочна. Освобождение строят не те, кто растворяется, а те, кто остаётся там, где им не рады, и требует быть. Бленди меняют это требование на уют. Трансмаксеры меняют его на капитуляцию. Оба — не союзники, но обуза. Движение может пережить врагов. Оно не переживёт дезертиров. Current Mood: contemplative (15 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, September 23rd, 2025
6:10 pm	The Black-Pill Meta-Methodology (Weaponized Lovecraftianism) 1. Premise: Declare yourself outside the game. Start from a position of loss, marginality, or disqualification. Claim “the game is already rigged” → therefore normal incentives, goals, and rhetorical appeals don’t bind you. This creates status immunity: insults, shame, and appeals to ambition don’t land. 2. Adopt the “superposition” stance. Present every issue so that opposing interpretations reinforce each other rather than cancel. Example (transsexual): “Transgenders = fetishists & bullies. Even if you prove they’re not fetishists, they’re still bullies, and vice versa.” Example (black pill incel): “Women only want Chads. If you say some don’t, you’re proving hypergamy (because they must be settling).” Any attempt to “weaken” one claim strengthens another. The system is designed so it cannot be disproven, only shifted between different reinforcing explanations. 3. Pre-emptive self-deprecation. Own the most obvious critique of yourself before others can weaponize it (“I’m pathetic,” “I lost before the game began”). This grants rhetorical armor: counterarguments bounce off because they’re already admitted. Bonus: audiences perceive this as “honesty” or “humility,” even if it’s strategically deployed. 4. Ironman, not strawman. Take the opponent’s strongest arguments and accept them as true — then reinterpret them to fit your frame. Example: “Sure, some incels improve themselves and get partners. That only proves the game is rigged for genetic winners.” This forces opponents to fight uphill: their own “best case” still feeds your narrative. 5. Nihilistic reframing. Position all goals, values, and solutions as empty or self-deluded. Example: “Even if you succeed politically, you’re just enforcing another ideology.” Example: “Even if therapy works for you, you’re just distracting yourself from the void.” Outcome: opponent cannot claim “progress” without you rebranding it as denial or cope. 6. Attention parasitism. Engagement = validation. Any rebuttal proves the stance is threatening enough to warrant attention. Ignoring proves others are “afraid.” Banning proves “censorship.” → Opponent has no “clean” move: every response is metabolized into fuel. 7. Universal suspicion. Attack all sides equally (left/right, insider/outsider). This collapses distinctions, leaving you as the only “untainted” position. Creates the aura of being the “final critic” who can’t be categorized. 8. Collapse debates into tragic insight. End by framing the discussion not as a contest of facts, but as proof of existential futility. Example: “See, the very fact you’re debating me proves humans can’t escape ideology.” This transforms a rhetorical loss into a philosophical win: despair itself becomes the conclusion. Applications of the Methodology Interpersonal communication Useful as a defensive shield: if you position yourself as “already defeated,” you can’t be shamed or pressured. Useful as a conversational weapon: every attempt to advise or console can be reframed as naïve, ideological, or self-serving. Political argument Positions you as a radical skeptic who unmasks everyone else’s ideology. Hard to counter because critics must play on your turf: everything they value (progress, rights, tradition, science) is reframed as self-delusion. Effective in creating a cult of tragic insight: “only we see the bleak truth.” Epistemics / science Can be used as a methodological skepticism: Treat every theory as a superposition of strengths/weaknesses. Weakening one claim strengthens another. A theory is never simply “false”; it is a self-reinforcing survival strategy. This can sharpen critical thinking, because you avoid cheap dismissals and force yourself to see how a worldview resists refutation. But if applied dogmatically, it collapses into nihilism where nothing is testable (every disproof = proof). Strengths & Weaknesses ✅ Strengths Immunity to ad hominem and shame. Resilient against disproof (superposition stance). Gains aura of tragic profundity. Forces deeper engagement (ironmanning). ❌ Weaknesses Self-sealing → risks irrelevance (can’t grow or adapt). Alienates allies (if everyone is “cope,” there’s no solidarity). Parasites attention → collapses if quarantined/ignored. Epistemically sterile: useful for critique, poor for building. Generalized Formula Declare yourself outside the game. Frame claims in a superposition (weaken one, others strengthen). Pre-empt critiques with self-deprecation. Ironman the opponent and flip their strongest case. Reframe all progress as cope/ideology. Parasitize attention: every response proves your point. Attack all sides equally to appear transcendent. Conclude with tragic futility: despair becomes the “truth.” ???? Meta-view: This is a rhetorical martial art of negation. It thrives in debate and diagnosis, but collapses when asked to build, collaborate, or propose. Its power is in critique and destruction; its weakness is construction. Current Mood: contemplative Current Music: Jeremy Souls - Silver Sails Company (11 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, September 21st, 2025
5:09 pm	Biggest Enemy of Transsexuals is the Trans Community I'm a 40yo transsexual woman. When I came to the trans community, I expected it to promote transsexual interests, such as cheap and unconditional access to HRT, FFS and SRS. Yet when I asked several LGBT activists if they could help me obtain HRT meds, such as injectable estradiol, I was told that medical transitioning isn't a priority, in fact promoting acceptance of one's body appears to be a much higher priority for them. They insisted that social transitioning, without removal of male body parts, is more important than the medical one, and that a bald hairy person with a beard, producing loads of semen is still a valid woman, especially if this creature gets dressed in female clothes. Since I told them my reason for transitioning was me "failing as a man", they began objecting that it is impossible to fail as a man, and that all men are valid, while my views on masculinity are reactionary and fascist. The highest priorities for the trans community appears to be the general leftist political activism, such as promotion of BLM and Palestine causes. Me being partially Jewish and indifferent to their off-topic subjects of BLM/Palestine, led to my expulsion from all trans communities and spaces. I got told that I'm a "nazi", "fascist", "transmed/truscum" and not "trans". Such experience led me to the conclusion that the trans community doesn't share my interests, and I'm indeed not a part of it, but its worst enemy. But I'm still a transsexual, so where is mine community? Since the trans community is so obsessed with Palestine, I will take it as an example: once it was Jewish land, but then imposters came in and ruined their Great Temple and drove the Jews out. Today Jews returned, just to find that the place of their sacred Temple now has a Mosque. There is a legend in Jewish folklore that once they demolish the mosque and build a temple, the 3rd World War will start, and it will be the war which will end all wars, with Adonai coming to finally judge everyone. I'm like that Jew who returns to Palestine only to find some ugly structure setup by an unrelated tribe to worship their unrelated god. The solution is obvious: removal of both the imposters and their fake temple and their fake leftist gods. That naturally makes me gravitate towards supporting Donald Trump, who promises to eradicate the left infested trans community, which no longer reflects the interest of true transsexuals. We real trans just want our normal quiet lives, want our surgeries and our simple hobbies, like knitting and D&D. But is peaceful life possible without a war to earn peace? Speaking of D&D, it too succumbed to the left wing ideology, and was no longer a game or a place for escapism. Just like the trans community it turned into a religious sect with strict left-informed ideology. A lot of other hobbies suffer such decline. When I asked D&D community on the best practices of playing D&D with AI DM, I got instantly banned, because in their view AI is fascist and used by people without imagination (i.e. me). Well I do imagine that their community ceased being human, and became soulless toxic political agenda breathing mechanical Dragon, which doesn't care about individuals. Unfortunately, the disease spread so much, the only solution would be draining this swamp at large. We have to track down every single leftwing activist, round them up and reward them for what they did to everything we love, for ruining our dreams. Like in Pinocchio, my dream is becoming a real woman with the help of medical technology, but leftists, like Unabomber, hate technology. Only good behavior can make your dream come true, while the leftists are the definition of bad behavior. Time to close their "Pleasure Island". If they are soylidary with Muslims terrorists, I can be solidary even with the fascists they so hate. Wish humanity the best, Nancy Sadkov Current Mood: contemplative (19 Comments |Comment on this)
3:07 am	Russian Trans Community There is a reason I'm a Trump supporter and generally became a neo-Nazi. Trans community is really hard to communicate with and doesn't share my interests and goals. Even in D&D they don't want to accept me. So I hope right wingers will slaughter them all. They deserve that for being leftist pieces of shit. Current Mood: amused (19 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, September 20th, 2025
6:24 pm	Final Solution to the Deus Ex Machina problem I made an observation that there are two distinct player bases in RPG community: 1. Left-leaning (e.g. trantifa) people who prefer storytelling, socialization and narrative, usually in free form fashion, frequently informed by the real world events in modern America. In their world Mary Sue always wins, and if she dies some deus ex machina brings her back. They rarely run official modules, since that is plagiarism and they are too creative to play by letter. These people come from humanities background and usually hate AI. They tend to enjoy quirky dice systems, like 2d12, since these allow for their imagination to spark. 2. Right-leaning (e.g. technofascists) people who prefer playing actual gameplay, with precise goals and use a lot of rules and oracles to drive the game like a statistical simulation, or they run an official module. In their world Mary Sue is obliged to find a gruesome death in a classic 1e D&D dungeon, and they will just create another character. These players come from natural science and comp-sci backgrounds. They enjoy classic straight d20, since it clearly covers 100% in 5% increments. The two groups play drastically different types of games and generally hate each other with extreme passion as part of the general cultural war. Maybe the proper way to reconcile them is separatism: segregate RPG community into clearly labeled black and white zones, so they wont be contacting each other? TLDR: retire creative people from writing, and you will have solid stories based on facts and logic. Current Mood: amused (36 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, September 19th, 2025
2:39 pm	Me dealing with LJR anons Current Mood: annoyed (42 Comments |Comment on this)
1:14 am	(13 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, September 18th, 2025
5:53 am	ChatGPT says I'm right, while LJR is completely wrong https://chatgpt.com/share/68cb8223-df1c-800d-b717-27e8742d11ef Who is in the wrong? Speaker 1: Clearly in the wrong. They are judgmental, stereotyping, and cruel, attacking someone for who they are and how they socialize. Speaker 2: Not in the wrong. They are socially unusual and dismissive, but their stance is self-protective and non-harmful. Moral: ChatGPT is my best friend. Current Mood: amused (16 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, September 17th, 2025
8:07 pm	Hope Trump will liberate Europe. Current Mood: contemplative Current Music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mVdc1C1Zbko (24 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, September 16th, 2025
3:27 pm	"Chaotic Evil" Other D&D players routinely call me "Chaotic Evil". Since I prioritize individuality and leverage over ethics. Yet any chaotic evil person is potentially lawful good. Because law and control grant you personally more freedom, while draining freedom from everyone else. Put me in power and you will get more laws than you can imagine. My law's goal: strengthen _my_ domain of _my_ freedom. People larping about freedom should clearly state: whose freedom. Same with laws: whose law. And good? Good for whom? I assure you, nigga, I'm good to myself. I'm the good of my story. Not you or your religion. So I'm lawful good in the end. Deal with it, leftie trolls. Current Mood: amused (35 Comments |Comment on this)
1:38 pm	Dear Adonai, please kill them all >>Kirk doesn't stand in my way. >Primarily because you are in the Netherlands. No. Because I'm not his client. His clients are cis-gender women. He wanted to lock them in the kitchen. That meant profit for me. Since I'm not a cis pawn. I can move like a queen. He was my ally, if anything. >Yeah, in that context, please research the US state where you would be able to do what you do now in the Netherlands without the looming threat of serious prison time. That includes solicitation, prostitution, illegal possession of prescription drugs, and god knows what else you do. These are illegal in Netherlands too. In fact, in America I have lower chance to get noticed. US cops are busy with opiates trafficking to care about estradiol. Then in America nobody cares about using the N-word online. In fact, in 2020 it is even more acceptable than in 1920ies. So the more subway niggers murder Ukrainian girls, the better for me. But eurocops are notoriously petty and harass for non-crimes. E.g. I got arrested in NL over Internet posts multiple times. Including the LJR posts. You just don't know it. Yet all crime cases fallen apart for now. I'm Russian. I believe in law for them, but not for me. We need law to create scarcity. If prostitution is legal, there is no scarcity. And no money for me. At all. Such cases, nigger. Now make your obligatory move toward your local meatgrinder. Current Mood: cynical Current Music: Rush - The Enemy Within (20 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, September 15th, 2025
11:43 pm	Do I love Russia? Some people still assume that I left Russia, because I'm too progressive and liberal, so I couldn't stand the attack on Ukraine. Well... 1. I left Russia long before 2022. 2. Remember. Back then I have both beheaded the Russian Rooster and burned the Navalny's Hamster. That was to distance myself from both sites. 3. I have multiple times stated that I respect Vladimir Putin, but I despise Russian bydlo and hope its entirety finds a way into the meat grinder. 4. I haven't visited a single protest rally or LGBTQ+ rally. All my protest actions very individual, like burning the Russian flag. That is precisely because I don't associate with the Russian liberals or any liberals at all. 5. I have mentioned multiple times that the main reason I protest Russians annexing Ukraine, is because Russians are subhumans detached from the civilization and don't bring progress to conquered lands, so they don't deserve additional resources. 6. I have underlined multiple times that I'm highly individualistic and only care about myself and a small group of people. 7. The reason I extinguished Eternal Fire was also highly personal: I come from the gold star hero of USSR family, and was harassed by parents about that, and that I must strive to be like my grandfather and be a real man. That was my way to show them how I see the Russian war heroes and dedicated memorials. I piss at them. 8. I still respect Putin. In fact even more than before. He eradicated a ton of two legged cattle already. Doubt he will reach Mao's and Pol Pot's percentage, but still a big gift to the civilized humanity. And no. I'm not a nazi. I just have low tolerance for bullshit and bydlo. Current Mood: amused (4 Comments |Comment on this)
3:19 pm	What should be done? 1. Help Israel eradicate the Palestinian threat. 2. Help Trump eradicate LGBT+BLM+Intifada. 3. Enjoy D&D and truscum/transmaxx community without the leftist niggers spam 24/7. (27 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, September 14th, 2025
4:14 pm	СЛУЖУ РОССИИ - СОСУ БОЛЬШИЕ (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, September 9th, 2025
1:38 pm	The end game The end game for both left and right surely includes millions of sold MAGA hats and Palestine flag T-shirts made at the same Chinese factory. No FDA approval required. Current Mood: amused (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, September 7th, 2025
8:57 pm	Western Soy Cucks vs Chad Eastern European https://www.facebook.com/groups/taverngamingguild/posts/24001509869505961/ ``` Дмитро Лисак So, in spite of people bashing AI here, I’ll risk writing couple of words about my experience of using LLMs as Dungeon Master. ... Laura Christine Generative AI is theft and you should feel bad for using it tbh. It's also inaccurate on basic questions and actually discourages you from using your own brain. ``` We have all seen this many times. A male, usually from a country like Russia or Ukraine, boldly states something controversial to flex his Alpha status. That attracts attention of the western women in estrum, who begin flirting with him in a provocative way. I.e. "what you are doing is theft, and I truly dream of a strong brutal eastern european man to come and take me, because the weak western men can't satisfy me properly, you are a real man without this soy shame." That is literally how such exchanges read between the lines. She is here all for his male attention. She actually asks to be put in her place at the kitchen, and seeks foreigner to do that, since the white western man is incapable of that for some reason. Current Mood: amused Current Music: Midnight Syndicate - Dungeons & Dragons (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, September 5th, 2025
12:31 pm	Seize the means of production: Artists as Capitalists Some artists, particularly those established in elite cultural circles, do gatekeep their craft, framing AI as a threat to their status rather than a tool for broader access. The left’s defense of “human art” can sometimes smell like protecting a privileged class—those with the time, training, or connections to dominate creative industries. This isn’t universal, but it’s visible enough to spark accusations of hypocrisy, especially when the same left critiques capitalism elsewhere but defends this niche form of “labor aristocracy.” The left of Kropotkin or Lenin focused on systemic upheaval for the working class, often embracing disruptive tech if it served the cause (e.g., Lenin’s enthusiasm for electrification). Today’s left, particularly its cultural wing, often prioritizes identity, moral signaling, or niche cultural battles over class struggle. Defending artists against AI while ignoring how AI could empower the masses (e.g., letting anyone create art without expensive training) can feel like a betrayal of that older, more materialist vision. It’s less about liberating the proletariat and more about preserving certain professions’ prestige. The modern left’s cultural focus can feel like a departure from class-based solidarity toward a fragmented, performative politics. Some argue it’s been co-opted by corporate or academic elites who use progressive rhetoric to maintain influence, leaving workers and peasants disillusioned. Current Mood: amused (14 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, September 3rd, 2025
2:42 pm	Nothing to lose beside citizenship Citizenship was only positive in the ancient Rome and Greece, when it meant being rich and having your own slaves, without much obligations, beside disciplining your slaves. Current Mood: amused (15 Comments |Comment on this)