Bol'shoe spasibo za Vashu zapis'. V ehtikh
delakh ya chelovek temnyj, malo chto mne
ponyatno. Osobenno v otnoshenii khristianskoj
antropologii: ya iz celikom neveruyuschej
sem'i, pravoslavnaya byla tol'ko babka po
materi, i, v obschem, tak nichego i ne znayu.
Nepodgotovlennyj chitatel', odnako, najdet
v Vetkhom Zavete nemalo mest, vyzyvayuschikh
rezkoe nepriyatie, i vot grekh kak raz iz
nikh pervoe:
"I skazal Gospod' Bog: vot, Adam stal kak
odin iz Nas, znaya dobro i zlo; i teper'
kak by ne proster on ruki svoej, i ne vzyal
takzhe ot dereva zhizni, i ne vkusil, i
ne stal zhit' vechno."
Chto ehto, pogreshnosti perevoda ili, so
storony Bozhestva, strakh konkurencii? Stal
kak odin iz Nas. Zamechatel'no, chto,
naprimer, Papa Grigorij v poslaniyakh k
Avgustinu
stroit ochen' kakuyu-to
matematicheskuyu model' grekhopadeniya:
For when our first parents sinned in Paradise,
they forfeited the immortality which they had
received, by the just judgment of God. Because,
therefore, Almighty God would not for their
fault wholly destroy the human race, He both
deprived man of immortality for his sin, and,
at the same time, of his great goodness, reserved
to him the power of propagating his race after him.
Kazhetsya, v Svyatom Pisanii govoritsya inache.
Slovo "parazitiruyut" (v rassuzhdenii o tom, chto
psevdolichnosti parazitiruyut na sobstvennoj
lichnosti cheloveka -- esli ona est') mne kazhetsya
ochen' udachnym. No tol'ko ya sovsem ne
uverena, chto ehto na nikh (na paraziticheskie
psevdolichnosti) razdvaivaetsya i rastraivaetsya
preslovutoe "ya" pri psikhodelicheskikh opytakh, i
dazhe pri zloupotreblenii vodkoj. Soznanie ved'
ochen' strannaya vesch', mozhet byt', i ne to,
chto my ponimaem pod lichnost'yu. Inogda kazhetsya,
chto ono (soznanie) stroitsya po negativnomu
mekhanizmu, chtoby otgorodit'sya ot vsego, chto
est' "ne-ya". Zloupotreblyaya spirtnym, mozhno
uslyshat' skrip ehtogo mekhanizma, na pervykh
stadiyakh -- paniku (gde zhe "ya"); soznanie
pytaetsya sobrat'sya, no po tekhnicheskim
prichinam barakhlit; utrativ opornuyu tochku,
ischet novykh. I na kazhdoj probuet postroit'
svoe malen'koe soznanie -- po-vidimomu, vse zhe
ne paraziticheskoe, a svojstvennoe iznutri.
No dlya polucheniya skol'ko-nibud' poleznogo
opyta s dissociativami, o kotorykh Vy govorili
(dumayu, i s vodkoj), ehtu panicheskuyu rabotu
zaschitnogo mekhanizma kak raz sleduet otklyuchit'
(tol'ko ochen' strashno), i chestno ispytat'
raspadenie na kuski. Kstati, vodku, kazhetsya,
russkij chelovek zatem i upotreblyaet, chtoby
steret' granicy mezhdu "ya" i "ne-ya" (esli ya
tol'ko ne oshibayus', togda ehto udivitel'nyj
phenomen narodnoj mental'nosti, kogda cheloveku
s ehtoj granicej nekomfortno, i ne strashno
ee razrushat').